I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
