Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I wish you could order shots online.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
