At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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