Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
