I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
