did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
ttyl tear gas
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize