Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
