yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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