thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
