STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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