Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize