i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Randomize
