Heybabeimwearingurpanties
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
