He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
