hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
