You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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