I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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