carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize