no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize