I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I love you.
Bad choice
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