I need help removing her.
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
