WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
