What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
