I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
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