Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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