My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Randomize
