I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I think I just sharted jello shots
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
