remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
