I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
