He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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