Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
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