i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
did i just pee glitter
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
