He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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