It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
