Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
