Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
