Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Randomize
