If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize