That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
