woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
He keeps bees of course he's weird
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
