Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
