sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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