yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
no you cant smoke seaweed
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Randomize