So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize