That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize