No, you can still breathe under the balls.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
