ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize