Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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