S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
