i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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